Friday, 24 November 2017

This familiar Fear - FMF

Five Minute Friday - writing for five minutes! GO!  

My precious fluffy son has been gone a year already, the time has flown but the emotions of grief are still there sometimes. I adopted him when I was 16, pretty young, and he went home to be with God when I was 32. It was so incredibly hard losing him, I still can't post pictures of him because it hurts too much but so much of me has healed too. I can think of him with joy and feel his presence because he still lives on, and he's apart of my life now, my memories and my heart. The pain of losing my pet was a big hole I never really felt ready for, it used to scare me sometimes, the thought of him one day going home. When the time came it was really hard. I grew up my whole life with animals, we had fish, geese, cats, dogs, pigs and birds and tortoises. I'm a huge animal lover, but after this I did not really think I could get another pet again. That feeling of grief and pain was all too familiar and I just don't know if I could do it again.

Three weeks ago however, I did start thinking about it. I miss having that pet companion. Someone to make the family complete and then I walked in to a cafe on a farm where we usually go for lunch and one of the cats there had the most adorable kittens. One of them came bounding out towards me and he reminded me so much of my boy. I feel in love with him and felt a strange feeling of warmth inside again. I said yes to the lady who owns them but came home with loads of familiar fears. Have I made the right decision? In a way I wish I could just hear "it's going to be okay!" Opening up to being a pet parent means opening yourself to loving and caring for a life. I pray it will go okay! I'm also praying I will get my boy because I'm going away and the other new owners will be choosing their kittens first, so I get the last one - please let it be my boy God please! 

Linking with Five Minute Friday

I have started a devotional section over on my author website. I've done a number of devotional series' on different radios this year and I've wanted to bring devotionals to my readers. The first 4 have been inspired by the book of Nehemiah, but they go deep in to the heart. I hope you will check it out and be encouraged!
HeartBeat Devotionals 


  1. Oh, bless you! We lost our Big Dog a few years ago and we still miss him deeply. Thankful to be your FMF neighbor today.

  2. I hope you get your boy!

    I now how hard this is; we have a sanctuary for unwanted dogs and cats. Some are older, and some are not well...and when they die, even if they've only been with us for a short time, it hurts as if the pain will never stop.

    And it never does stop, but from that pain, I have found, grows a stronger love.

    Blessings to you, dear heart.

    #1 at FMF this week.

  3. Lauren, even as a mostly non-pet person, I know how deeply animals can get into our hearts. I once owned an orange kitten for only 3 days. (Long story.) I cried so much when I had to give Dorrito away. May you be given comfort and joy in your new little kitten. :) Visiting from FMF #44 this week.