Friday, 12 May 2017

The moms who did not Bear - FMF

Five Minute Friday, writing for 5 unedited minutes, and it's the time I let my heart write. No head, just heart and whatever comes out, comes out, sometimes its revelation even for myself! Here goes! This weeks prompt is "mom." 

I've never incorporated the word mom in to my world, simply because I knew I did not want my own children, people find that strange. The fact that hubby and I did not want to be parents to our own children one day. But it's simple really, we love children and have a deep heart for orphans and our spiritual children, the ones we've mentored and loved over the years. We love our nieces, and aunty me over here is forever buying my 4 month old little niece all the little things I can afford (and can't afford). I love her, but mom? Not my identity and not God's either it would seem. I went in to a pre-menapausal state at the age of 29 when my body stopped producing estrogen. It was a very difficult time as hormones play such a huge role in our bodies, more then we know. And at that age and the complications I had, I had to decide on some hormone replacements or a hysterectomy. People gasped when they heard that, but hubby and I knew it was a prayerful decision we could live with. I did not have a hysterectomy and finally this body responded to different treatments and I'm all fixed up now. The part of my identity that has formed around the word mom, is simply somehow being a spiritual mama to many. I love advocating for adoptions and connecting with women that have, this comes from a deep place because Love is part of who we are as children. I have a wonderful earthly mom whom I an thankful for and many spiritual moms over the years, I am so glad for each and every single one of them, I just love them. And the women who have come and invested in my life with love, without having birthed me, they are the ones I hold closest to my heart and to my phone, when days are hard. So perhaps the spiritual moms we have do become the ones we truly value and remember, I think so.

Linking up with Kate M

Thursday, 11 May 2017

When my husband folds the undies

I grabbed my art equipment and headed for the door. My hubby stood over the sink, washing dishes. I kissed him, and silently paused just to watch him soaking the soiled plates. The moment was sacred. He was doing the dishes so that I could live a dream and he was happy to do it. So many times, I have walked out the door, on way to a radio interview, or a woman’s meeting and hubby has taken care of the floors or dishes.

 Where I am stronger, I boldly lead. Where he is stronger, he helps, he aids and he settles the fires that can burn out of control especially in ministry. We help one another and boldly place the Messiah as the head of our home. Our testimony and our scars have borne witness to the equality that we have been given as children of God. We never hesitate to love and serve one another, even in our imperfections, of which we have plenty.......

 I'm writing over at Jessica Galan's this week, about the marriage and equality, join me! When my Husband

Thursday, 30 March 2017

My Unexpected Journey to Fight Gendercide

In China, a basin of water sits on the table, warm water waiting for another Chinese soul. After the mother gives birth, a baby boy is washed clean in this basin and tears of joy stream down his proud parent’s cheeks. However, it is a regular practice to hold down a baby girl’s tiny form under the basin’s water, her breath swallowed whole by this baptism of death. Her life discarded and unwanted, all because she was born female. This routine killing of baby girls in China is called gendercide, and thirty-four million girls have been killed in the last thirty years....

Please join me over at Off the Page to read about how God called me to the fight against gendercide. This topic is so close to my heart and I really want to share it with you!

My Gendercide Journey

Friday, 24 March 2017

Let Logic or Faith Lead?

 My chest is tight, my palms are sweaty, I can barely hold back my tears. I’m an emotional mess. I’m undone in this place of prayer. I struggle to find the words I need—but I know He knows. Nine months ago, I was given a vision by God to create, steward, and lead. This unraveled into an opportunity to recreate the stories of 13 extraordinary women in a photo essay that would finally culminate in an exhibition in an art gallery in Cape Town, South Africa. God provided faithfully every step—until the provision dried up and I entered the desert.....

I'm writing over at YMI this week about a journey of faith, please join me to read the rest of my story! Let Faith Lead - YMI Today 

To Embrace the Temporary

Five Minute Friday, writing this week on the prompt, embrace... Go!

 It’s hard to embrace what you inevitably know, you will leave behind. And I wonder about this guardedness of temporary embraces. My husband and I are in the kind of ministry, where we often go to places to establish, commission and do God’s work in that place, but we move on. We never stay and less times do we return. Not because our hearts don’t long to, but because our Saviour says, I have other nations for you, different plans, different places. The harvest is plentiful, the labourers, few. I think about this momentary moments we share with others, the moments that carry the deepest weight because they are Heavens moments. So perhaps the temporary purchases something eternal, salvation or destiny, perhaps both. Then I think about people who come in to my life and leave, so much of it feels seasonal and sure that season can last for a month to a few years, eventually though we as people move on. My mom had friends of 30 years and even their lives journeys split. Is it just so? Do we embrace temporarily in a place where we are guarded or unguarded for a while? Is that the deep divine message of life God is really teaching me, and us all? Yesterday while reading my bible I read a verse I’ve read before, only this time it was the one I needed to pause on. It was a verse about the Holy Spirit, and how the Spirit of God is within us as a taste of things to come. I sat thinking at all the beauty of Yeshua I have encountered this side of life. I thought about His presence, and His peace, His Love and His truth. I breathed in, fighting for peace at present. And then I closed my eyes and held in my heart the small tiny embers of these things and suddenly I was filled with awe, one day I will not have to endure the temporary. The temporary loves or joys, the temporary beautifuls, I will be tasting the main meal, not just the starter. One day it will all be permanent, and forever, real and without end and His presence and Person I will embrace and finally there will be no more ends, just a forever beginning….

Linking with Kate M

Tuesday, 21 February 2017

Just so you know...

My book has been out seven months. I may be forgiven in thinking it's been longer, because for me it has been of course, from start to finish. The hype around releasing a book is crazy! Your publisher gets you excited about launches and newspaper articles and all sort fo things. You go from radio station to radio station, meeting to meeting and if you know me, that's exciting stuff for my "experiencer" personality. I thrive in planning, organising, networking and anything that spells "new." So when my book finally got released, it was a gift that felt surreal.

There was a particular book store I had walked passed for years, with its beautiful big glass windows, showcasing a handful of books and I often paused wishing one day something I had written would be in that window. Imagine my amazement at one day walking past that store and seeing Yehudit in the window! It felt like the air was sucked out of me and I was transported in to some heavenly place. Little gifts from God were planted everywhere in those first few weeks and I was grateful for every one of them. 

Fast forward several months and it feels so long ago. Two weeks ago, a dear friend posted a picture of himself holding Yehudit in his arms. He had seen it at a bookstore in his local mall and snapped away - what a great friend! He posted this picture on social media and when he did I told him, gosh releasing that book feels so far away, like it's old and forgotten now. His reply breathed life my way, "no it's not old! People are still picking it up for the very first time and once they read it, it's new and then it starts all over again."

His words were incredibly heartfelt and true. So today when my publisher surprised me by email with the words "Yehudit is unexpectedly in one of S.A.'s most popular magazines," I was totally excited. I bought this magazine and opened it excitedly. The feelings were new, the excitement new and different, age and faithfully stewarding Yehudit has turned my excitement in to something deeper. It's all part of my journey, and part of me and it's new everytime. Yeshua is also reminding me how He has not forgotten this beautiful, heaven birthed story. I always knew it was a seed I needed to plant and walk away for others to eat from it. I always knew it was His and today, He showed me again with such love that, He is always working where no eye can see. This is encouragement for me, as I set my heart on new things both in my present and in my future. God is working where I cannot see. So faithfully, so "big" and so powerfully, in deep Love, with passion for His child. He is always working and never too early but never late. I'm taking courage today with this sure promise that He knows and always has my best interest at heart, surprising me with Love Gifts every step of the way -just so I know I am not alone and that it will be alright in the end. This goes for you too precious one, He is working hard where no eye can see, working it out for your good, never early but always on time.

 If you haven't yet grabbed Yehudit, you can over at Amazon

Friday, 17 February 2017

Is Faith Brave?

FMF - writing on the word "weak!" Unedited, free flow of writing, set the timer for 5 and let's hit it! go!

This week Abba Father has been leading me back to the yellowed pages of Narnia. I've been reading it with fresh tears, never before has the story pulled on me but now it's new. New because I'm in a different place and the revelation and truth are pouring through the lines as though God Himself were the narrator and no one can hear the words but me. I am struck by Peter's first battle. New sword, a wolf about to attack his sister and her desperate cries for help. It's a moment filled with the deepest fear and yet the presence of bravery. "Peter did not feel very brave; indeed, he felt he was going to be sick. But that made no difference to what he had to do.” 

Brave Faith. It's my journey at present, with no other Voice but God's. Peter did not feel brave, he felt something quite different from braver or even faith. He was in all regards ill - equipped to take on a wolf who led the white witch's army, but none of this mattered really. It made no difference to his purpose or his destiny. He was fearful but he still held out his sword, he still shook as the wolf lunged towards him and he still defeated the wolf, thereby saving his sisters life. He may have felt weak - ill equipped, or scared but it did not hinder what he was called to do. In many ways fear is a natural part of life. It is there when things are new, when things are scary or unknown, or questionable. It is there when we stand on the sidelines and finally God calls us to play on the centre stage of life. It is there when we lean over the edge of the boat like Peter did and say "here Yeshua (Jesus), pick me, let me walk on the water with you!" 

Fear is there, but it makes no difference. What did make a difference was the choice Peter made while standing in the forest of Narnia, to go forward instead of backward. And in so doing a part of his identity was revealed, he was knighted by Aslan himself and he became Sir Peter Wolfs-Bane. If you stop when fear or uncertainty calls, you will miss the blessing of deeper identity and intimacy with the King. To go where fear is present only means that you have gone in to a place where you feel small and weak, and thats the very place of bravery, a place of destiny, a place of calling.

Linking with Kate M

 Hey I'm a Guest Writer over at Y Am I this week, do you want to take a look? I'm getting real about the day I overlooked my marriage vows! Truly marriage is a deep blessing, but we have to share the truth especially with our children! My Marriage Vows!